HELLLOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!




im in a gd mood today! everything so far has gone goooood. and the thing about sam has blown over now, which i am relieved because i really dont like being jealous. especially when i have no reason to be!!!





also i was talking to peter in english about sam, and i think he's gonna tell him what i said! luckily, ive got the note that we were writting so he has no proof to any of it! i dont think it would really matter if peter did tell him, but it's just that i was thinking, if we're gonna ever go out again (and he told me this too) then we should keep it a secret because ever time we go out, the next day the whole school knows about it, and i really dont want that to happen.





it makes it so much easier if you have a boif that doesnt go to the same school as you because then you dont have to be around other people critasising you , and going 2aww! they're such a swet couple!2and all that rubbish. it really annoys me(even if i coo at some couple sometimes-i need to stop coz i know how annoying it is!!!).





so i had this idea (just now), what if me and sam where to go out in the half term holidays? i mean that would be good, because you always act different arround people when you first go out, so if we were going out for a week without anyone knowing, then when we come back it wouldnt seem any different! how clever am i!!!





just the thing is, i said to myself when i stopped going out with will that i wouldnt go out with somebody, untill i was really ready- i mean untill i meet somebody i really like. a christian boy. i cant keep going out with non-christians, because if we get too close, and they are still non-believers, then i cant stay with them (you know the whole missionary dating thing and all) because i would be really in love with them, and then have to break up with them(like mariah did).





and that would just be like---the end of the world. i mean how do you get your boif or a boi you fancy, to become a christian without getting pulled down to their level(i mean the non-followers level)? relationships seem so difficult. yet in the movies they look so easy! peter said i am difficult. yh i totally agree with him. i am such a difficult girl! also lukas said i am typical too (and he said it wierd which was really cute!!!).



well i guess some guys will always be the same. even thou i thought sam had changed, maybe he hasnt. people werent making such a big deal out of it except me, so there must be something there.
get back to you later...
bye bye xxx